July 6th?

It is hard to believe that I have not blogged since July 6th! I know that it is NOT because I have nothing to say:) I have not been putting in the time to blog and my writing in other areas is suffering because of it. Blogging everyday, even when it was about "nothing" kept my mind moving in a writing way. Without it I am struggling to put school papers together and even simple emails. I think it is time to throw blogging back on the "to do" list.

So, today is Day 1 and this is my post.

Hiding? Me?

Yes, I have been hiding from my blog, I started feeling uncomfortable putting my "junk" out in the world. Lucky for all of you I have come to these conclusions 1) Blogging really helps me release some of the junk in my head 2) I like when people read it and 3) my life is just to dang interesting to deprive y'all any longer:) So, I will just jump back in like I never left. Life is BUSY around here. Baseball games, softball games 4th grade, 3rd grade, 1st grade, vacations including the husbands current one at the local hospital. Life is busy. Life is busy but I am calm. The past several weeks as brought an amazing sense of calm to my life. Internal peace. I have not mentioned it much for fear of jinxing it I guess, but it seems to be sticking around! I hope this means that I have found what I have been looking for...balance. Surely with all I have going on this week will be the test!

Testing.

I am trying to disconnect my blog from my facebook page, but I am not having much luck. Iʻm finding that I am not finding blogging as freeing as I did before I knew who was reading it. So, here I am trying to see if I have disconnected:)

Maybe Itʻs Working

For months I have been actively searching for ways to cope with the stress in my life. Yeah, Iʻm the kinda person that stresses about EVERYTHING! You name it, I stress over it. It is crazy and unhealthy, but yesterday was a great test for my stress-reduction methods and it seems to be working.

Yesterday I had so many of my regular stressors thrown at me and I was fine. I never had an anxiety attack, didnʻt loose a bit of sleep and never even got angry. I easily processed all the information I was given and then let-it-go. It was an amazing feeling. Normally, I would have "talked" this all to death and over analyzed it. I would have kept the husband up half the night listening to me work through it all, but instead I was asleep by 10 and slept peacefully through until 7am:)

I am not sure if this is the wave of the future, but I hope so. It was/is an incredible feeling to recognize, process and release stress from my life. Committed meditation & Tia-Chi maybe the answer for me!

Today is gonna be a good day...even if I have to see the meanest doctor ever:)

Trying To Get The Word Out!

Stafford County, VA...

Their is a Special Education Parent Teacher Association(SEPTA) Forming NOW!!!!

If you are a Parent or Teacher in the county and would like more information on this Group or would like to join, please come to the organizational meeting next week.



YOUʻRE INVITED!!!!

What: Organizational Meeting for SEPTA

DATE: Tuesday July 26

PLACE: Austin Ridge Community Center

TIME: 7:00pm

Home, in Virginia.

Ben, the monsters & I spent the past five days in New Jersey where we both grew-up. It was a our annual "summer trip" to the Jersey Shore to visit the family we both have left in the area. We stayed with my in-laws who were more than accommodating, as we once again successfully destroyed their clean & peaceful home. We do preform this same ritual when we head to Florida and stay with my parents. We destroy & disrupt these houses. And we do this because these are no longer OUR HOMES, this is not where we live. So when we come to town it means we not only visit our parents, but all the extended family we have too!!! And this usually occurs at the host parentʻs home:)

Let me explain. Until very recently, I viewed where my parents lived as "home". It didnʻt matter that my parents moved from NJ to FL or that Benʻs parents didnʻt live in the same house in NJ "home" was the house our parents were living in. I donʻt feel this way anymore. Now, home is Virginia. Home is "The Nut House" where I live with MY FAMILY, with Ben, the monsters, our pups and even our fish:) Home is where the mess gets made and WE have to clean it up. The place that extended family comes to visit us. Where the monsters go to school & where we belong to the community.

New Jersey isnʻt home anymore, it is the place where I grew up. Itʻs a place my family travels to visit our extended family of grandparents, aunts, uncles & cousins. Just like Florida isnʻt my home, it is my parents home, where we again go to visit our extended family. Our home is in Virginia.

It is a curious feeling to call Virginia Home and an incredible realization that your parents & siblings are now extended family, instead of immediate. It seems odd that Ben & I have lived in the DC metro area for 16 years, our monsters are 9,8 & 6 and I am just now recognizing these changes. I think I have been toying with these thoughts and emotions for sometime, but part of me thought that if I never said(or wrote) it out-loud, some how it wasnʻt real. However, now by making this acknowledgement it means that I am take the final step into adulthood.

I am Home, in Virginia with my family.

I Missed That Lesson!

I have three monsters. Declan is 9, Killi 8 & Margaret, the "baby" is 6. And as the "baby" and at six, she is and has always been treated like the "baby". Sure, plenty of people tried to warn me of the pitfalls of this action. Hell, I lived it with my brother who is 5 yrs younger than my sister and 7 yrs younger than me. I know what this looks like clingy, spoiled, mean-to-everyone MONSTER!!!! I used the phrase "just let her have/do/see it just to shut her up, more than I ever imagined it could be used. So, given the fact that I recognize that I have done this one must assume that I would NOT make this mistake again, but...I HAVE!!!!

Pepe, Killiʻs(my) sweet little puppy has now become my second Maggie. He pushes the kids away when they try to love my. He steals toys from Gus and the monsters. And just as we broke Marg from crying at the door when I leave, Pepe now sits at the door and barks and cries when I leave him at home with Ben and the monsters. Itʻs crazy!

The other night I went out and when I got home it was reported to me that Pepe cried for the entire 3 hours I was gone. He also fought with Declan about going to bed(he sleeps in his crate next to me:) Once in the crate, no one could sleep because he barked and whined until I walked in the door.

HOW THE HELL DID I LET THIS HAPPEN TWICE!!! I said after my brother I was NOT going to do this and now I have not done it once, but I have done it TWICE!!!!! Do you think their is a class I can sign myself and the "babies" up for to break this forever? I wonder it Declan, Killi & Gus wish they were the "babies"? And if my brother has not grown-out of being the "baby" at 29, is there any hope that I can break the 6 yr old monster and 9 month old puppy? For the monster I can at least say that she is well mannered and behaved in public for the most part, maybe that should be my goal for the puppy:)

This I have learned, I will bring no more babies human or other animal, into the mix here. No more until this lesson is learned!

Or maybe I should just project all my "babying traits" on to sweet Baby Marshall...Vicky would LOVE that, Duncan & Z too!LOL!