Right now I need a place to "express" myself. I seem to be having trouble doing this as of late without ruffling a great number of feathers. I don't mind the ruffling part as much as I mind the expectation from others that I should a. care that I have ruffled b. apologize for ruffling and c. sensor myself.
Well, here is what I am NOT, I am not one to beat-around-the-bush. I am not ever going to be voted most popular. I am not a follower. I am not weak. I am not controlled by my husband.
What I am is, straight-forward, nondiscriminatory, a nurturer, passionate, intelligent, strong, explosive.
What I am trying to be is, conscience of how my life choice effect the very few people that are my life. I am trying to understand that not everyone is as strong as I am. I am trying to remember that small-town politics suck! I am trying to remember to trust Nobody outside my house.
With each stage I move though in life the lessons seem to be much the same and I have never been very good at falling-in-line and I am not sure I will ever be able to do so...you know what, I know I won't be able to and I don't want to. I don't want to live in Stepford, but I don't want my children to suffer because of that so where does that leave me? Right now it leaves me up at 2am wondering. Wondering, but knowing that no matter what I do or say I have a husband that will love and support that fact that I have opinions of my own and a right to express them!
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