Grief.

Grief: deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement That is what people keep calling the feelings I am experiencing right now, grief. Today, I am calling it anger. Today I have incredible anger for what I believe to be the injustice of having my father taken from me at only sixty years and two months old! The social security administration website tells me that I still have 19 years and 10 months left with him before he dies, 80 is the life expectancy of a male born in February of 1953. So the way I see it, the SSA lied to me! They have cheated me out of nearly 20 years with my father and I am angry about it! I'm angry at Phillip Morris for continuing to sell cigarettes long after knowing the harm it can cause people. How a company can knowingly sell a product that causes a disease like lung cancer is amazing. It makes me angry. I'm angry at the medical professionals who have not found a cure yet for lung cancer. I'm angry at the people who have fought and won the battle because it is just NOT fair! Yep, I know this feeling of anger is unhealthy, misguided and unproductive but that's how I feel today.