The Thing Is...

I remember when I was growing-up learning how things only had the value they do because we agree to it. For example, D-O-G spells dog, the symbol 1 represents one item and so on. I believe this concept to be true. The concept that symbols, sounds, words, laws, only hold the value you accept them to. Remember when President Clinton pondered what the meaning of "is" is? Well, my point is that things mean different things to different people. Sometimes it is because of where you live or how you grew-up. Sometimes your "meaning" comes from your own life experience. The point is, that until you walk in someone's shoes, you cannot know what is meant by their words or body language. I think before people judge others, they should remember that their way is NOT the right way for everyone, that their way is NOT everyone's way and that is okay.


Next topic. People are ignorant! It is ignorant to put people down because you disagree with their opinion on an issue. Not sharing the same opinion is fine, not having the facts to make a knowledgeable judgment is ignorant. I have a friend that I almost NEVER agree with on ANYTHING from the way we parent to politics, that said, it is a rare occasion when she and I are unable to discuss an issue civilly. We hear what one another is saying and respect the passion and knowledge the other has for the issue. When we are done, we rarely convince one another to change sides, but we also do not think the other "wrong" for their beliefs. This is not the case with most of the people I know and it makes me wonder. Why do so many people become defensive and mean when someone questions what they believe? Why do people resort to putting others down when they disagree with them? I guess it is because they could NEVER be wrong. I guess it is because their way is the ONLY way. I guess I should be happy for those "perfect" people that are ALWAYS right and have life all figured out. To never have to listen or hear what others are saying must be a satisfying life.


People are different, some are crazy, but it is all good.

Adjustments...

It is time to make some in my life. Time to refocus and spend a little time taking care of myself. I need to get back on the treadmill. I feel so much better when I am on it everyday. For me, exercising brings balance into my life. I don't do it for weight-loss, although I don't mind that, I do it for the peace it brings to me mentally. I am not sure if it is the endorphins released or the 30 mins I get to spend listening to my ipod alone, either way it seems to make my life better. I think it makes me a better wife, a better friend and I know it makes me a better mother. So, it is a win-win for everyone in my life.

Here's to hoping I can get up Monday and start doing it:)

35!

If you continue to read this you will see that I started this post much earlier in the week, but for many reasons a crazy week and wanting a little more perspective being the biggest reasons, I never finished.

Here is where I started:

On Friday I will celebrate my 35th birthday and that seems old to me. For the first time, I feel like I am getting old. It is not the gray hair, that has been there for years. It is not even the wrinkles that are starting to form around my eyes. I think what is making me feel old is that my baby turned 5 today. I am the mother of an 8 yr old, a 7 year old and a 5 year old...that cannot be! Where did the time go? It is hard to believe that at 24 people so many people told me I was too young to get married and at 29 when I told my husband that we had to have ONE more baby before I was 30 and too old to have them:) Now I am happy that I got married at 24 and had three kids before I was 30. I am not sure I would be able to be starting my family now. I fell old with an 8,7 & 5 year old, I could not imagine having a newborn now.

I know that the way I planned out my life doesn't work for everyone, and I know how lucky I am to have found the *man of my dreams* at 15
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Now it is Saturday morning and I AM 35. And as I suspected, I feel no different today then I did on Thursday. I got alot of feed-back from friends when I expressed my concerns about 35 and most of what they said was good and did help clarify what I was feeling. 35 is just a number. The only reason this birthday hit me with a reality check is that it was a "5" and the "5" and the "0" birthday's tend to make me stop and think about where I my life has gone since the last "perspective" birthday:) So, I spent way to much of my time reliving the last five years. What I found was that I did not have all the huge moments that I had in the 5 years before, but that doesn't mean that I have done nothing. And what I have done has been good. A college degree, 3 monsters moved from babies/toddlers to kids, traded Mom's club in for PTO, enrolled in a Masters program, and really grew in my marriage. Looking at it, I see that I have done "stuff" over the last 5 years, important stuff. Stuff that will set the stage for the next 5 years.

35 is not so bad thus far. And it looks alot better now than it did on Monday:)

The Wrong Way!

I have spent the better part of my day watching the House debate the Health Care Bill and resolutions. It is making me sick. It is not about where I stand on health care, but the fact that this Bill is full of back-door deals and buy-offs to get votes for a Bill that ALL the poles say the majority of Americans oppose.

I don't think people oppose the idea of health care reform or coverage, but they oppose this Bill with the lies and the tax hikes it has in store. I am not sure that now is the time to raise taxes for coverage that will not begin for years. I have sat and listened to Democrats...Hold up, I just listened to an extension of the first time home-buyer credit be added to health care...WTF!!!! Are we doing Health Care or just everything? I wonder why people are so distrusting of Congress.

So, back to health care, the Democrats have stood tall today shouting about saving Americans money and getting everyone health care, but this Bill does not do that. This Bill raises taxes TODAY, but coverage will not begin for many, many years. Who is that good for? The Americans with no jobs struggling to pay their bills. The Americans that have jobs with no health care that will be required, by law to go find coverage for themselves? Now is not the time to strong-arm Americans into health care, not like this. Not with the LIES and Votes that were bought.

I am glad that Congress knows better than the American People, their voters, the people that elected them to office. I hope people remember in November how little their Representative cared about what they wanted or cared about and I hope that in November when the Democrats loose dozens of seats in Congress that the President and Speaker have secured jobs for the Congressmen and Senators that will be sent packing due to the strong-arming they have done.

I only hope that this mess can be fixed before America crumbles completely. Small government. I guess I live in the wrong place. Truly, I could accept universal health care if the majority of Americans supported it. That is NOT the case. Seriously, federally funded abortions? Is there nothing the government will stay out of?

I am very nervous now...I guess I should start figuring how much less the paycheck will be.

To Tired

I am too tired to blog, but have alot I want to share. I want to talk about football, the small town we live in, food, and the great weather. Hopefully I will make it back tomorrow to share!

Will I NEVER Learn?

It is clear that I will NOT. Well, maybe it is that I just don't care to. I am the kind of person that gets pissed-off and cannot let it go! To make it worse, little things are always the ones that push me over the edge. I am truly a "straw that broke the camels back" kinda person. Now, I am annoyed and am taking my ball and going home! I will admit that I am a big brat, but right now I do not care!

Today is the day that I have decided to put MY FAMILY FIRST! I really could care less about anyone else right now. More than my family, I feel like putting ME first! Yes, I know how selfish that is and I don't care right now! The monsters are in bed and by morning I will probably be ready to be a mom again:) And Ben is pretty tired and happy not to interact with me tonight and by morning I will be ready to be a wife again.

I am not sure that I will be ready to be a friend tomorrow or anytime soon. It will take almost everything in me to even be civil to the outside world. Maybe a good night's sleep will turn it all around, but don't bet on that!

Justice.

My father brought this story to my attention this morning and I have not stopped thinking about it since. I find so many things wrong and appalling about The American Justice System after looking into this case.

Let me start with the Pennsylvania Firearm/Gun Law as it pertains to minors. Here is the Law:
Per 18 Pa.C.S. § 6110.1 (Possession of firearm by minor), the minimum age to possess a firearm is 18 with two exceptions:

1. The minor is under the supervision of a parent, grandparent, legal guardian, or an adult acting with the expressed consent of the minor's parent or legal guardian and involved in lawful activity.
2. The minor is lawfully involved in hunting or trapping activities.

The articles I have read and interviews I have watched, state that Jordan Brown received the shot-gun used in the murder from his father as an Easter gift. No where does it say that Jordan "broke into" a gun safe or stole this gun. The gun was given to Jordan, an 11 yr old by his father. If I am understanding the law correctly, Jordan should not have a gun AT ALL unless supervised by an adult. Remember, no one ever questioned Jordan's access to the firearm.

Next I want to address the fact that the Jordan, an 11 yr old at the time of the murder, is being charged as an adult. Charged as an adult, and with 2 counts of murder. The murder of his father's fiancee and her unborn child. My problem with this is that all the medical evidence I have found supports the fact that an 11 yr old, does not have the ability to think, comprehend or reason in the same way an 18 yr old does. I have to imagine that the majority of Americans support that belief, otherwise we would not have voting age of 18 and 11 year olds could join the military. But, I am sure Jordan completely and with premeditation, murdered his father's fiancee and her unborn child because the 11 year old mind can do that.

I am the mother of three, I have an 8, 7,& 5 year old. My son is about 2 1/2 years younger than Jordan was when he shot Kenzie Houk and I am not sure I believe that my son could comprehend the finality that comes from shooting someone and I am certain that he could not all premeditate the murder of an unborn child. I think that there are plenty of people involved that should share in the responsibility of these murders, but throwing a child, a child, in prison for the rest of his life does not seem like justice, it seems like child abuse.

The prosecutor in this case said that he had no choice but to charge Jordan as an adult of not charge him at all, and that he said could not happen. No, instead of trying to help a child that clearly has problems, he is going to lock him up and throw away the key. A child that has yet to reach puberty, a baby, a 5th grader. A boy that has never dated or driven a car because he is too young. A boy that is not old enough to go to rated R, adult movies. It makes complete sense that this child could premeditate the murder of his father's fiancee and her unborn child.

Mind you, Jordan was arrested and placed in an adult prison until prison officials admitted they did not have the resources to accommodate a child! The prison system recognizes Jordan as a child, but not the prosecutor. So, what happens if he is convicted? Does he sit in a juvenile detention center until he is 18 and an adult, then moved to an adult prison? I am not sure I understand the logic behind charging someone with a crime that they are not old enough to do the time for. Is that JUSTICE?

I am beyond sorry for the daughters of Kenzie Houk that are now growing up without a mother. I do not however think that charging an 11 year old as an adult in the murder is not justice. But what do I know.

Gossip.

People do it.
Get over it.
It happens to everyone.
Be flattered that someone is wasting their time talking about you.

And please stop trying to tell me I cannot do it. For that is the only
sure way you have to get me to do it!

A Rebel Without A Cause...

That is what my husband thinks I am. I am sure he is not alone in this thought, I am sure I have many family members and friends that also wonder where I am coming from. I do not see myself as a rebel, maybe a nonconformist, but not a rebel. I do not take my non conformation easily either. I just think I am less likely than others to just conform.

Most people I know simply follow the ways of the world, because the actions they are following seem harmless and for the most part they are; I on the other hand, wait and think it through before hoping on board. One example of a seemingly harmless conformation is reciting the Pledge of Allegiance in school. See, I have no problem at all with the Pledge and could not be prouder and more happy to be an American. As an adult citizen with the power to vote, I feel Pledging my allegiance is important. I also feel I understand what each and every word in the pledge means and stands for. I do not however feel like my children do. I also feel that having millions of school children recite the pledge everyday, cheapens it. I want people to WANT to pledge! I want people to understand what they are pledging to and for. I do not want millions of kids standing and pledging to something they don't understand or want to be part of.

Another area or unrest I have is the ignorance and laziness of the American voter. I believe that there should be more of a qualification to vote other than age. When people become citizens of the U.S. they have to take a citizen test. We do this, I am told, so that they understand how the U.S. works. Explain to me why in world we think that being born in the U.S. and living to be 18 gives us the right to vote? More disturbing still is the actual number of people that participate in voting. Americans do not realize how lucky we are to walk into a clean, safe polling center within a few miles of our homes. I think people should know that. I think people should know that voting is a duty as a citizen. You should take it seriously, do it and understand why.

Being an American is very special to me. I have been fortunate enough to see first hand, how hard our leaders work for me to have the freedoms and rights that I do. Rarely does a day go by that I do not think of all the people that have given their lives for the freedoms that I have. I know that without them my life would not be what it is.

Am I a rebel? Probably. Would conforming make life easier? Probably. I know it would make me think a lot less:) I don't start trouble just to stir the pot, well not always, if I have an opinion on something it is because I have really taken the time to really thought about it. So, take it for what it is worth, which is not much, just my opinion, but a deeply thought out opinion.

Glory Days, Well They'll Pass You By...

It is interesting how people come in and out of your life. This weekend I reconnected in a most bizarre way with a childhood friend. This was a friend that I spent many days and hours with during my elementary school years. There are few memories I have between 5th and 8th grade that do not include him. Whether it was Saturday mornings watching the WWF(I loved Junk Yard Dog;-), or building a stage to preform our own Bruce Springsteen "Born in the USA" concert, he was always there. Slow dances at the Pavilion, with Robbie Roper as Deejay or holding hand on a field trip to Valley Forge, so many memories shared then High School came and we went our separate ways. I often asked about him when I ran into childhood friends, but no one had much to report.

This weekend that all changed. As of Saturday, we are almost related(a thought I am sure he finds horrifying:) My new sister-in-law is cousins with this long-lost friend of mine. So, as I sat at the reception watching my kids dance, I watched his dance with them. And what a reality check that was. it is one thing to know you are aging, but quit another to be faced with it. When your memories of someone stop at fourteen, it is hard swallow your next memory of them as a husband and father of two. Where did the time go? I remember those dances like they were yesterday! Now it is 20 years later and meet reconnect at a wedding where we talk about our children and introduce one another to our spouses. Married! Parents! What happened?

It is interesting how people come in and out of our lives. How the people you share so much with slowly disappear and often never become more than a memory. I know there are people in my life now that I see everyday or almost everyday that in 20 years will no longer be part of my life. I know this now as an adult, but at fourteen I didn't. Now I know that as my life changes, so do the people in it and that is okay. It is interesting though how those people I knew in elementary school, really know ME. I always find a certain level of comfort in running into those old friends and I did again this weekend.

A Quick Trip to Jersey!

A whirl-wind trip to NJ for this:

My baby brother got married! His wife is clearly not the brightest as we warned her off but she still married him;-) Honestly though, I am very happy for both of them. They seem so happy and I hope they stay that way forever!

Selfishly, I am very happy about this wedding as it means extending my family to include 2 new sisters and a great set of additional parents! When a couple gets married often times their families don't come with them, Unfortunately that is not the case for Kelly's parents and sister(and husband). They got us all! They may have thought they only signed on for Skippy, but they got us all! They are a wonderful family and I am so happy that Billy has brought them into my life.

Getting It Out of My Head, And Into Yours...

These are the things that have been on my mind the past few days.

Washington, DC has legalized same-sex marriage. This does not affect me personal, but as we live in the metro area, I am happy to see discrimination come to an end in DC. I am hopeful that this will say something of our country that in our Capital City same-sex marriage is accepted and perhaps sooner than later it will be accepted throughout our country. And to my readers that think I am an ultra-right-winged conservative(you know who you are:)I keep trying to tell you I am not;-)

Pedophiles are the lowest form of humanity to me and I think that there are enough studies proving the inability to reform, that once convicted, there is NEVER enough time served for their crimes. They should NEVER be allowed back on the streets where they will, according to statistics, almost certainly molest another child.

I hate when I am caught off guard in a conversation. It doesn't happen often, but when it does it throws me off for days. It makes me unsettled and less trusting, not that I take people at face-value often:)

My baby brother is getting married this weekend!!! I am excited to share this special day with him and to welcome his new family into ours, although I am not sure they know what they are getting;-) Hopefully I will have lots of GOOD pictures from my new camera to share with you!

A Birthday Present For ME!

After months of research and trying to justify the purchase, last night Ben bought me this camera for my birthday.

Yes, I know that my birthday is 24 days away, but I wanted it NOW and my wonderful husband(who NEVER says NO to me;-) agreed to the purchase. I am very excited to have my brother's wedding this weekend so that I have a chance to try it out. I am just hoping that it is as easy to use as the reviews say...I am not a direction reader so it better be easy:)

I will keep you posted, with good pictures I hope, as to how it goes!

The Fire Is Lit!

My husband has decided that the house is a cluttered mess! With projects that have been piling up and now have become overwhelming, I am not sure where to start. Do I start with the pile of shoes in the foyer. The one that is NEVER neat. Nope, can't start there because where would I move the shoes to? What about my "Monica" closet in the hallway...hummm, nope because where would all shit in the closet go? Maybe I should start BIG project of switching the kids rooms. Declan is being forced-out and into the smaller room, but even that I have been dragging my feet on and really, nothing else can be done until they are moved! There is not enough room in the girls room to put all their clothes away which then leaves them in baskets in my room and clutters that!

I am so overwhelmed! Because that list is just the beginning. I have a dining room that needs to be overhauled and a playroom that needs a new arrangement. Laundry that is piled sky high and no place to put it if/when I do clean it! If only my mother could come for a week and work the whole time;-)

What is making it more overwhelming is that we are very busy in the coming weeks. With committee meets, teacher conferences, trips to NJ, PTO commitments and Ben having to work everyday I am not sure where to find the time. I also never even mentioned the kids activities of scouts, football,friends and school work and my school work.

I guess the best thing to do is just jump in and get going! Just start somewhere and go from there. So after I drop the monsters in the morning I will come home and get started! I think I will start with the bedrooms. I know Ben thinks this is a bad idea, but I think I will feel better. with the rooms switched, not painted but switched, I will be able to get the laundry moving and away. From there I can move to the "Monica" closet. Then the dining room and last the playroom. I would be very happy to accomplish all this by Thursday Night so that I could come home from the weekend in NJ to a clean and organized house(HINT: if you are placing bets, don't go with Thursday;-). Especially since I slept for a little over 2 hours last night and am still up at 2am.

The good news is that Ben has lit the fire under my ass, so I will at the very least, start thinking about the projects I need to do;-)