Thanks, Ben.

As anyone who has read my blog this week knows, it was not one of my best. The best way to sum it up is that I wasted alot of valuable time on things that were not so valuable. As I look back on this week and the things I did and see the things I wrote, I am sad and embarrassed. Because I acted that way. Because I was so stressed. Most of all I am sad and embarrassed that I lost time with my family because of my actions. It was crazy and I am so happy that I see that now. I hope that I can continue to see what is important.

What made the light shine, you ask? I'll tell you, it was much needed time alone with my husband. Time for me to talk and not have to guard what I was saying. Time to bounce feelings and ideas off someone who wasn't there to judge, just to listen. Time to just be me, with the only person who really knows who that is.

I love that he can follow my conversations as I jump from one to another and back, sometimes days later:) He makes the fact that I cannot follow a routine a good thing, not a bad one. He understands that I am driven solely by emotion and he is there to provide the reason. That is what he does for me, he balances me. And boy did I need that this week.

This post is not meant to make people think my marriage is "perfect" if "perfect" exists, because it is not. We fight and take each other for granted just like other couples. And we have our ups and downs, but the key is that WE have them. Together we have them. The point of my post is to say that I am sorry. I am sorry to my friends and family and especially to the 4 other people that have to live with me. I am sorry for the time I waste that could have been spent with you!

I am going to keep working on remembering what is important in life because who knows how many "do-overs" you get...


Today, the Lamar family laid their son,husband,brother,father and friend,SGT. Donald Lamar to rest. Sgt. Lamar was 23 years old. He was a 2 time purple Heart recipient and a True American Hero. Please think of them tonight as you say your prayers and/or Good Nights to your loved ones.